Co-sleeping is when a parent(s), baby, and or toddler shares a bed together on a regular. Does it work? It can! Is it comfortable? Not all the time! Is it safe? If you take the proper precautions!
I co-slept with my three previous babies, but this latest go-round with our fourth has not been the easiest. Like they say, every experience with newborns and toddlers is different and this time it’s so different it hurts. I must admit though, its more my fault than my husbands. No matter how many times we told ourselves that we were not going to co sleep with our next little one, we, I mean I, ended up doing quite the opposite. The crib or playpen would be in the very same room with us and still somehow I would end up carrying them to our bed. There are definite pros and cons. Here’s what I’ve experienced thus far:
1. The Bed
Pro: If you have a king-sized bed… WONDERFUL, even a queen size will do. Just give your baby his own blanket and have him sleep on top of the covers. Bonding is another pro in this case because it can enhance the relationship with you and your baby.
Con: If you have a full size bed and both you, hubby, and baby are sharing this bed…ummmmm…yeah… no go! Unfortunately this is my current situation. We made a bit move about a year ago and gave up a lot of things — our queen-sized bed being one of them. So we had to downgrade to a smaller bed. I’m thankful to have a bed, but grumpy in the morning from tossing and turning making sure lil man has enough room.
2. Sex
Con: Ummmmm yeah…either get creative or suffer! We will just leave it like that!
3. Breastfeeding and Diaper Changing
Pro: I don’t have to get up 2 to 3 times a night to change and feed little man. Everything is right there. His food and diapers.
Con: His doctor says due to his age, weight, and intake of solid foods he should only wake up to nurse once a night, two at the most. Ha! Not this 10 month old! When I told her he wakes up to nurse more than 3 times a night, she almost fell off her seat. She gave me some tips, but in my mind I knew they would be irrelevant until I got him out of our bed.
4. Transitioning kids from your bed to their own
Pro: None!
Con: I do not have a pro for this one. It is what it is: a challenge! I have had 4 children and trying to get them to sleep in their own bed is not cute at all. Because of the bonding and the security they feel, sleeping in their own room and bed has been a CHALLENGE. I’m happy to say our first three children at ages 6, 4, and 2 do currently sleep in their bed now, however there was a price to pay with crying, tantrums, and sneaking in our bed in the middle of the night. Am I ready for the challenge with my 10 month old? NOPE!!!!
So there you have it!
Do you co-sleep with your little one? What are your pros and cons? How did you transition your child out of it?
Kim is the author of Reboryn where she discovers what it means to be a woman of GOD, wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend and entrepreneur.
Hi Kim! Glad to see we’re not alone ! My husband and I don’t talk much about this because most of our african American friends are ‘cry it out’ parents. Our Asian and Indian friends are like ‘what do you mean cry it out ‘ they still co sleep, and our white friends are a mix. We are Black folks, and since we never know how this topic will be received we never talk about it outside of the home. Our sweetie is four and is still in our king sized bed, and yes having them sleep on top of our comforter is important if you don’t want the covers kicked off of you ever hour :). We are trying to transition her to her room- which is more of her playroom, now- pray for us!
Yours in Christ
Hey J!
Thank you for sharing. Yes I agree sometimes you have t be careful in who you share your things with concerning your children because people can be so judgmental. And if they really tell the truth and be honest I’m sure they have done the same. Sheesh I wish we had a King Bed, then maybe all four could lay with us! JUST KIDDING!! LOL Anyway, yes just take one day at a time. You may have to lay with your little one in their room until they get comfortable in laying in there by themselves. But the transition will happen , just be consistent!
God Bless You Sis
Kim
Hey there!
My baby is 16mos old and we still co sleep. We used to have a queen sized bed, but upgraded when he got a little longer and wanted to form the letter “H” all night.
We are looking to transition him to his own bed in the near future, but we are also weaning. We didn’t want to spring too many changes on him all at once.
For the most part, it’s been relatively easy. The night feedings, when he’s sick, waking from teething…we don’t have to wake completely to tend to him. For us, it’s worked. And we have definitely had to be creative with love making. But that’s what we have other bedrooms for!
But I can imagine how much more peaceful sleep will be without a foot in my neck….ummmmmmm